A Glimpse Of You

Something I wrote in 2008, six years ago, when the loss of my dad was still very much painful and raw. I had missed him terribly, so much more then the times now.
It's hard to describe how this poem came about in my head, but I remembered vividly on a bus to work one afternoon, I saw, no, glimpsed the side profile of this man sitting at the corner of the bus stop. For one split second, I truly thought that I saw my dear papa again.
In a flash, the bus moved off going onwards in its journey, leaving the man further and further behind, and a fresh knife wound in my heart.

Here goes...

My Familiar You

A glimpse I caught, and then the bus moved.
I thought I saw someone that reminded me of you.
That same walking style and familiar silhouette.
That same side profile, and your almost hairless head.
The same way you used to carry your bag
The same everything, except that you are already dead.

A profound sadness then washed over me,
I thought for one moment, I saw you, Daddy.
I close my eyes and imagined myself
Breathing in the scent, of you and your soap smell.
And of how it felt like to hold on to your arm,
Chatting and talking to everything under the sun.

How fast time flies, in the blink of an eye
It’s been two years, since we said our last good byes.
After your death, I had feared I’ll forget you
In time to come, it seems to come true.
It seems that you are thought of, less and less often.
It seemed to me that you are almost forgotten!

In times like this, suddenly I remember
Of you and your being, and of how it all were.
Tears somehow, well up in my eyes,
As I recall how we spent those times
Laughing and sharing your favourite foods,
I miss those moments. I know they are gone for good.

Unwittingly, your memories get pushed further back
In my Heart and my Mind, everything seems packed.
Then I remind myself to dry my eyes,
That you are now living in paradise.
Watching over me and everyone,
And watching over Sean, your baby grandson.